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Your Guide to Social Invitation Dress Codes – What to Wear to Your Special Event
Deciding what to wear to parties these days seems to be more and more confusing. There are several terms that mean the same thing used on invitations. This duplication leads to many gray areas when it comes to what you really must wear to your event.
Here’s a quick reference guide to dress code implications for social events, listed in order from casual to formal. I follow this with a quick look at what constitutes a tuxedo and differentiates a ball gown from an evening gown.
Relaxed – This means that you must use your own good judgement. Remember; it never hurts to look a step better than everyone else! Please avoid clichés like Christmas ties and reindeer antlers!
Dressy Casual goes the same way as business casual, but maybe a little more formal. A nice shirt with buttons or a collar for a man will match a pair of nice jeans. THEN want a sports coat. Some people say that jeans are not appropriate, but I think they are fine if they are dark wash, dress jeans. Shorts are definitely not appropriate.
Business Casual – Men should wear a sport coat and trousers, no suit is required. Women must also wear something other than a suit. Dresses or slacks with a sweater work well. The overall theme is that you must be neatly dressed and professional in appearance.
Cocktail attire – Remember, the word cocktail means fun, so don’t try to dress in your work uniform. Something less than formal but more than business is required. For women, that means short, elegant dresses for her and dark suits for him. Elegance and sophistication will give you a step up when you wear a dress. Stay away from flash and glitter, instead simple and streamlined. Typically, cocktail wear is knee length, but if you’re wearing a simple straight skirt, you can wear a longer hem. If slacks are your choice, pair them with a slim and sexy top. Silk blouses or cashmere sweaters will dress up your trousers. With trousers or a skirt, be careful to avoid looking like you are going to a business meeting.
Semi formal – This is the sketchiest of all dress codes. Women can wear a dress, pantsuit or suit. Great fabrics for women’s semi-formal wear are the luxurious fabrics of silk, velvet and cashmere. Usually everything goes smoothly. Dresses can be cocktail dresses, no more than an inch above the knee, or they can extend to the ankle. For men, this usually means that tuxedos are not required. A wedding scheduled for after 6 p.m., still requires dark suits for the man and a cocktail or a short elegant dress for her. Daytime semi-formal events mean a suit for him and a matching short dress or dressy suit for her.
Creative black tie – You have leeway to create your own look. A trendy interpretation will combine a tuxedo with a black or colored shirt and without a tie. Fashion trends can sometimes dictate that different color choices for the pants and jacket for the tuxedo are appropriate. She can wear a short or long dress or maybe a long skirt with sequins or lace and combine it with a light cashmere sweater.
Black tie invited – This means that you don’t necessarily need to wear a tuxedo, but it tells you that the event is indeed a formal affair. A dark suit and tie is another option. Women should wear long dresses, cocktail dresses cut to the shin or combine separates that are festive and beautiful.
Semi formal dress – For women, semi-formal means anything from a dressy business suit to a cocktail dress and never a ball gown. The golden rule of the semi-formal dress: keep the hemline to the knees or lower, but never touch the ground. Men will wear a dark suit and tie or slacks and a nice shirt with a blazer/jacket.
Black tie optional -This indicates that men should wear a dark suit and tie or use the option of wearing their tuxedo. The darker the suit color, the better. Black, dark grey, super deep navy blue. Your shirt/tie should not be playful or made with crazy patterns, to follow the theme of black tie seriousness. I found a great quote online about this, and while it seems tongue-in-cheek, it contains a touch of reality: “Black tie optional” is passive aggressive. It means, “If you don’t think we’re worth the trouble of wearing a tuxedo, we won’t kick you out, but are we really asking too much for you to dress up for once?!”
Formula – This is usually the same black tie. In more fashion-forward cities like LA or New York, it could also be interpreted as a black shirt worn without a tie and combined with a tuxedo. Women have more freedom to wear cocktail dresses, floor-length dresses or evening separates.
Informal will often mean the same as casual. If this invitation is associated with a wedding or other special event, you should at least step it up a notch with a dress for her or a nice shirt and a pair of pants for him would be considered casual. Be sure to show respect for the event.
Black tie – It means formally all the way. While men should wear tuxedos, women will wear cocktail, long dresses or dressy evening separates.
Ultra formal = White tie – So why don’t they just say white tie? Perhaps because many people are confused about what white tie actually is! Men will wear full tuxedos; women will wear long party dresses. Floor-length dresses are a requirement.
White tie – This is even more formal than black tie. It is ultra-formal with men in full tuxedos, with white tie, waistcoat and shirt. Women should definitely wear long prom dresses and not an evening dress.
For your information:
A typical tuxedo combination would include:
A black short coat
White dress shirt
Black Dress Shoes, typically in patent leather
Ball gowns versus evening gowns
A ball gown is typically worn with hooped skirts or a petticoat. These dresses are generally created using velvet, taffeta or silk and modest coverage on top. An evening dress is floor length and is typically cut closer to the body and does not use petticoats or underwires. The evening dress also typically shows more bust line and can be strapless or have small spaghetti straps.
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