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My Ex Girlfriend Hasn’t Called Me! – Well Here’s What to Do
So you’ve been dumped, you spent some time alone, and now you’re dying for some communication with your ex. What is she up to? Where is she? Getting in touch with your ex is a crucial part of getting back together, but it needs to be done carefully or you’ll scare her away.
Contact ex girlfriend etiquette requires you to leave your ex alone for a while after the breakup, and hopefully you have. Too many guys go over the top when it comes to staying in touch after a girl dumps them. They think it’s okay to still call and email their exes, message them on MySpace, or post on their ex’s Facebook wall. Texts are the worst offenders – if your girlfriend broke up with you and you’re still trying to text her every day, you’re really just shooting yourself in the foot. Nothing you can say will interest her right now, at least not until she misses you.
So how do you make your ex miss you and want you back? By walking away. By not contacting your ex to the point where she thinks you disappeared off the face of the earth. When your girlfriend breaks up with you, she’s always looking over her shoulder to see how you’re doing. It makes her feel desirable to see that you are sad and that you miss her. It’s comforting to know that the breakup is affecting you. Deny her these things and she will feel insecure about her decision… and very curious. Curious about what you’re doing, who you’re doing it with, and why you seem to have gotten over the breakup so easily.
These are the things that make your ex call you. But if she still hasn’t? There are ways to contact her that are non-intrusive. I’ll list them below, but remember that you should have cut contact with your ex for at least a month before making these moves:
Return of property – In the first days and weeks after your breakup, this excuse to contact your ex is quite weak and contrived. But after a month? You can always call or email your ex and tell her what “stuff” she left with you. You can’t call over something silly like a toothbrush or an audio CD, but if your ex left behind clothes or a lot of belongings, you can always make this seemingly innocent connection.
Congratulations – If your ex has achieved an achievement recently, you can call her to congratulate her. Maybe she graduated from school, got a promotion at work, had a birthday… something like that. Calling to say congratulations is a great way to reconnect without seeming ulterior motives, and your ex will actually think it’s sweet that you remembered her on this day.
Family inquiries – Dating someone usually puts you close to their family, which can be another good way to connect with your ex. If her mom had a scheduled surgery, call to see how it went. If her brother left for the army, call a week later to ask how he is doing. Being close to her family gives you a semi-decent excuse to reconnect once or twice after the breakup, especially if you’ve been dating this girl for a long time.
There are a lot of other great ideas for contacting your ex when you want her back, and these are just a few. Still, getting your ex to call you is the best option. Learn everything you can about communicating properly after the breakup, and more importantly, know what to say when that contact is made. The right moves, made at the right times, can put your ex back into a mindset where she misses and wants you back in her life again.
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